Sunday, January 04, 2004
Doctor Who - Scream of the Shalka (parts 1 & 2)
I can imagine the producers of Scream of the Shalka are a bit pissed off.
There they are, making new Doctor Who for the BBC, with "proper" animation from Cosgrove Hall. They've even got it endorsed as canonical by the BBC, with Richard E Grant being promoted as the ninth Doctor.
And what happens? BBC One comes along and announces a new series of Doctor Who!
Not just another one-off TVM, but an actual series, the most new Who we've had on TV since at least 1989, possibly since 1985 if recent reports about the series' length are to be believed.
Suddenly, Shalka moves from being a revival, and an indication that some elements of the BBC are still behind the series to being just what most non-fans (and many fans, to be honest) would have always seen it as - an Internet cartoon. Hell, it's not even that animated is it?
But even it is has been upstaged, Scream of the Shalka is still new a new Doctor Who story, and it's the closest thing we've had to a proper new TV story since 1996. But being "new" suddenly isn't enough, is it?
Paul Cornell isn't my favourite post-TV series Who writer, but even so, the first two (of six) installments left me thinking, "is that it?"
After a Pertwee-style title sequence, we find a pair of scientists investigating a meteor crater. It's almost painful to listen to, with terrible lines, especially the "Volcano FM" one. Thank goodness we're soon out of there and in Lancashire, where something strange is going on.
Having the Doctor travelling alone is always risky, as we saw with the dodgy start to Big Finish's Storm Warning, and our first glimpses of Grant's Doctor are not at all inspiring. He gets lumbered with some truly terrible lines, and isn't helped by the fact that the animators have decided to make him look like Dracula for some reason. Even so, Grant is pretty much going through the motions by the sound of it.
Things pick up, well slightly anyway, when the Doctor arrives at the local pub. The best thing here is Sophie Okonedo's Alison, who, even this early, is clearly being set up as a potential companion (or at least a pseudo-companion for the purposes of this story). Unfortunately, the Doctor is still proving to be a bit of a disappointment - I can just about forgive him ordering a drink (but did he really expect them to do much more than just red and white), but the jukebox stuff is pathetic. On the plus side, the underground threat seems suitably menacing.
However, by the end of episode two is all starting to go tits up, and I'd be surprised if many non-fans were still bothering with the story.
The Doctor might have had some bad lines in episode 1, but you have to admire Cornell's ability to give him some even worse ones here. Yup, I'm talking about the "poetry" stuff, which is quite honestly absymal as far as I'm concerned. Without wishing to sound like a miserable git, does anyone apart from the writer and maybe one or two of his mates find this sort of thing remotely clever? It's just fanwank as far as I'm concerned.
We also meet the Master in this episode. With someone like Derek Jacobi playing the part (a great improvement from Eric Roberts in the TVM and Anthony Ainley during the 1980s), you'd hope that he gets some good lines, but instead we get him saying that, "empty vessels make most noise." Jeez, I almost feel embarrassed for the guy.
Okay, so we're only 2 episodes in, but things aren't really looking good. It's just as well that BBC One announced a new TV series because as "the return of Doctor Who", this is a big disappointment so far.
I can imagine the producers of Scream of the Shalka are a bit pissed off.
There they are, making new Doctor Who for the BBC, with "proper" animation from Cosgrove Hall. They've even got it endorsed as canonical by the BBC, with Richard E Grant being promoted as the ninth Doctor.
And what happens? BBC One comes along and announces a new series of Doctor Who!
Not just another one-off TVM, but an actual series, the most new Who we've had on TV since at least 1989, possibly since 1985 if recent reports about the series' length are to be believed.
Suddenly, Shalka moves from being a revival, and an indication that some elements of the BBC are still behind the series to being just what most non-fans (and many fans, to be honest) would have always seen it as - an Internet cartoon. Hell, it's not even that animated is it?
But even it is has been upstaged, Scream of the Shalka is still new a new Doctor Who story, and it's the closest thing we've had to a proper new TV story since 1996. But being "new" suddenly isn't enough, is it?
Paul Cornell isn't my favourite post-TV series Who writer, but even so, the first two (of six) installments left me thinking, "is that it?"
After a Pertwee-style title sequence, we find a pair of scientists investigating a meteor crater. It's almost painful to listen to, with terrible lines, especially the "Volcano FM" one. Thank goodness we're soon out of there and in Lancashire, where something strange is going on.
Having the Doctor travelling alone is always risky, as we saw with the dodgy start to Big Finish's Storm Warning, and our first glimpses of Grant's Doctor are not at all inspiring. He gets lumbered with some truly terrible lines, and isn't helped by the fact that the animators have decided to make him look like Dracula for some reason. Even so, Grant is pretty much going through the motions by the sound of it.
Things pick up, well slightly anyway, when the Doctor arrives at the local pub. The best thing here is Sophie Okonedo's Alison, who, even this early, is clearly being set up as a potential companion (or at least a pseudo-companion for the purposes of this story). Unfortunately, the Doctor is still proving to be a bit of a disappointment - I can just about forgive him ordering a drink (but did he really expect them to do much more than just red and white), but the jukebox stuff is pathetic. On the plus side, the underground threat seems suitably menacing.
However, by the end of episode two is all starting to go tits up, and I'd be surprised if many non-fans were still bothering with the story.
The Doctor might have had some bad lines in episode 1, but you have to admire Cornell's ability to give him some even worse ones here. Yup, I'm talking about the "poetry" stuff, which is quite honestly absymal as far as I'm concerned. Without wishing to sound like a miserable git, does anyone apart from the writer and maybe one or two of his mates find this sort of thing remotely clever? It's just fanwank as far as I'm concerned.
We also meet the Master in this episode. With someone like Derek Jacobi playing the part (a great improvement from Eric Roberts in the TVM and Anthony Ainley during the 1980s), you'd hope that he gets some good lines, but instead we get him saying that, "empty vessels make most noise." Jeez, I almost feel embarrassed for the guy.
Okay, so we're only 2 episodes in, but things aren't really looking good. It's just as well that BBC One announced a new TV series because as "the return of Doctor Who", this is a big disappointment so far.
